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cats in the cold

by mage tears

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1.
i feel alone even at home rather be outside, a cat in the cold make lots of new friends, we don't have to speak explore in the night time, don't need to be seen i'm trapped in my bedroom inside my bad dreams i pray for a good one but we'll just have to see closing my eyes, holding my rabbit's hand if you somehow need me, you know where i'll be wake up at 2pm just to fall back asleep another day is gone, i don't want to be me i don't think i.could be more than i am but people in my life, they believe in me
2.
i was scared when you looked at me i'd forgotten what it feels like to have someone like me i wanted to make you a playlist but i didn't know where to start i'd forgotten what it feels like to show someone my heart i don't know the right words to say i think i'll sleep away the day i liked it when you said my name it somehow made me feel real again i'll crawl back into bed and dream of better days i'm the one that's only nice to watch from far away i was so sure it wouldn't work out but i was so sure that it would
3.
green 02:04
cried in the rain yesterday because i felt so out of place this is the last day that i'll never be okay because i won't do you looked deep in my face said my outfit matched my eyes today the sky was cold and grey you didn't look back to wave when you walked away now i'm without you
4.
if there is another world i hope you made it there, i hope you're proud of me if i was another girl who would i be my friends are the leaves, i wish you were here with me all i do is grieve, i wish you were here with me
5.
sun and moon 03:20
think i lied this was the happiest i'd been in a while you were the sun, i was the moon wish this didn't have to end so soon you kissed my head and i felt myself fall in two i can't sleep because i thought i finally found you i would get up if i could but nightmares are always where i end up a constant hum that i'm not good enough
6.
vampire bat 02:28
i hate that you don't know that you're bad and if you do you don't care about that you scheme at night, a bat in flight ready to pounce on anyone that looks right how do you sleep with blood on your teeth i try to dream but there's too many bite marks in me
7.
destined 02:04
i don't think that i am destined for anything at all i don't even know why i sing anymore there's something in the air that tells me to care i think that others laugh at me when i sit alone at lunch i've always had a messed up brain, it drives me insane i wish that i could scoop it out and start all over again it's not fair
8.
looming 02:25
where will i go after this class if i don't have love or a dream job i'll live with my mum like i always have and honestly i don't mind that sometimes i think about those who hurt me i wonder about where they could be it isn't my fault that i'm still this sad but these days i'm starting to think that it's me who is bad
9.
nervous 01:05
lost the special leaf that i picked up woke up this morning with my heart beating out of my chest falling over rocks mud on my socks
10.
fairy seeds 04:37
always in my head when i sleep can't get what you did out of me terrified to ever even speak when i reach my grave will you finally leave 6 years old and catching fairy seeds i was safe and everything was green time travel to here and now i'm stuck i'm left feeling dull while you pull the wool never know what to even say i want to go away everything is starting to look weird i want to get out of here
11.
what did we talk about i can't remember now it's all blacked out walking around town, i see the shadows of us there is nothing left after you left

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released August 18, 2022

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